Money money money

I spent $ today. Lots of $, by my standards.

I bought 6 pieces of Gingersnaps clothing for the 2 girls, 1 Styleworks shirt for dar, 1 Mango romper for myself, 1 box of Pigeon breast pads, 1 Pigeon straw brush, 2 sets of Fancl cleansing oil and washing powder, and finally a medium Le Pliage Longchamp bag.

The above may not cost a lot to most of you, but it does for me. Why? Because I do not draw a salary. That's why I have to think for a long time even before buying the Longchamp bag (which only costs <$300) which I have been eying for a while now as my diaper bag.

My income comes from my dar now. And out of this income, I give an amount to my mum. The rest is mine to spend. However, it never seems to be enough. And mind you, I don't usually spend on shopping. I only buy at most 2 pieces of clothing per month, and usually don't spend more than $100 a piece; the usual range is <$50 for a top and <$100 for a dress. Unless I need to buy clothes for special occasions, eg wedding dinners etc. I do also spend on food when I meet up with my friends, and cab fare and misc etc.

And I don't buy lots of shoes. Though I love looking at shoes. More because it's difficult for me to find shoes which are comfortable for me as my feet are rather wide at the front area. Yes, I have duck webbed feet.

So, it was rather liberating for me when I spent that amount of $ yesterday. Even though I know I have to cut down for my next month's expenditure.

It's times like these that I wish I was working. Of course, I can just waltz into the shops and spend what I want and claim the $ from my dar. Of course he will nag at my buys, but he will pay for them.

But he will never understand a woman's love for bags, shoes nor clothes. Just like all men, he will never comprehend why we need another bag when we already have another of the same size which serves the same purpose.

It's not just about owning another expensive bag or pampering myself to another spa. It's about having the freedom to buy stuff with my own money. It's about having my own spending power without having to "ask for permission" every single time.

I wish I have my own income to buy my LV or Gucci or Tiffany as and when I want without feeling guilty. I don't even step into these shops coz I know I don't have the means to. I wish I have my own income to treat my dar to a nice meal once in a while and pamper him. I wish I have my own income to send my daughters to the best schools (supposedly) to be educated by the best there is. I wish I have my own income to send my parents off to a holiday trip overseas which they have never taken, ever. I wish I have my own income to spend on whatever I want without watching my budget every month.

I wish I have my own income.